Anonymous asked: Hi, I've been talking to this guy for a while and I guess he's a potential partner or whatever. We've talked about sex and basically all the stuff I'm not willing to do as a sex repulsed ace (he knows I'm ace but I decided not to tell anybody about the sex repulsed part) and he acts very open and accepting but he always says the same thing "How do you know you won't like it if you've never tried it?" and he fights with me saying I'm not willing to even try. How can I explain this to him nicely?
He’s getting a bit confused. When you say, “I’m not interested in trying that,” what he hears is, “I don’t like that.” Of course you don’t have evidence about liking it, but that’s not what you’re saying. You’re allowed to simply be uninterested in (or downright against) trying something. And he simply has to deal with that. When it comes to consent, you don’t have to be nice about enforcing your boundaries.